Goffman, some sociologist freak said that your body represents your identity and it can govern the way you feel and work. So, if I apply Goffman to my body, the formula works;
Unproportionate body + low confident = andrewkin
I hate my body. It's too thin. I have broad shoulders and thin arms. The only muscle attached to it at the moment looks like some miserable sweet potato. I took off my shirt today and I saw horrible ribs underneath (or is it beside) my small, untoned and flesh-LESS chest. Can you believe it? The ribs are visible to the point where you can count them! What happened to the ideology that you get fat in Australia? I definetely eat more than I used to in Malaysia and made a point to consume more meat than usual ... but I still look like Jake Skellington from Nightmare Before Christmas.
AND
I do exercise. I try lifting 6kg of milks everyday hoping that the arm won't shrink. I push up everyday! I sit up frequently. Not high-intensity ones, but some is better than none right? I am obviously wrong! Everything just fall flat! Things couldn't get worse until I saw my flat, square, "cometed" butt. I thought butt are suppose to be round??? I think mine was previously fine but since when it got squared? or maybe I was born with a square butt??? *andrewkin looking worried. Was it the Body Balance I do twice a week? No right? If toning and restructuring your posture means getting a square ugly butt, I am officially taking Body Balance off my exercise routine! Will try on lunges and squats. If the lunges and squats doesn't help - I am signing up for gym again. Gotta waste money, if you wanna look good ...
Shucks ... I think I should just rename my blog to andrewkin-ramblings-with-complains
Unproportionate body + low confident = andrewkin
I hate my body. It's too thin. I have broad shoulders and thin arms. The only muscle attached to it at the moment looks like some miserable sweet potato. I took off my shirt today and I saw horrible ribs underneath (or is it beside) my small, untoned and flesh-LESS chest. Can you believe it? The ribs are visible to the point where you can count them! What happened to the ideology that you get fat in Australia? I definetely eat more than I used to in Malaysia and made a point to consume more meat than usual ... but I still look like Jake Skellington from Nightmare Before Christmas.
AND
I do exercise. I try lifting 6kg of milks everyday hoping that the arm won't shrink. I push up everyday! I sit up frequently. Not high-intensity ones, but some is better than none right? I am obviously wrong! Everything just fall flat! Things couldn't get worse until I saw my flat, square, "cometed" butt. I thought butt are suppose to be round??? I think mine was previously fine but since when it got squared? or maybe I was born with a square butt??? *andrewkin looking worried. Was it the Body Balance I do twice a week? No right? If toning and restructuring your posture means getting a square ugly butt, I am officially taking Body Balance off my exercise routine! Will try on lunges and squats. If the lunges and squats doesn't help - I am signing up for gym again. Gotta waste money, if you wanna look good ...
Shucks ... I think I should just rename my blog to andrewkin-ramblings-with-complains
Andrew~ Andrew~
ReplyDeleteI really understand how you feel bro (Sis better ah?). Coz I felt the same way as you are feeling now. Last time when I 1st joined FF, pain so much $$ for cekik darah PT sessions just to try and bulk up, coz tired of being the skinny one around, as you say, can count ribs. Ppl got washboard abs, I had washboard ribs. Then after several months of painful training, saw some results. At least some. So then stopped the PT coz though could workout with my boy boy instead.
Then lightning and earthquake struck. Don't know what went wrong, my body started to shrink. I was loosing weight. Trust me, IT WAS BAD! I got angry with myself, why? why? why? I ask. Like I'm not training hard enough. Everything went backwards. Ppl said.. eh you lost weight ah? U training or not? I practically broke down and just wanted to give up. Was really disappointed with myself.
After 1 month of that stupid "period" cycle, everything is back to normal. Can now at least stand up again, thanks to support from that special person.
Just remember dear, it's not all about working out, it's also about what you eat, and most importantly, what's going on in your mind. Set a goal, put lah a few months, don't say want to have a B cup chest in 1 month. Definately impossible! Hahaha!
Take it easy, relax, breathe, and the most important thing is don't stop! We are both going through the same thing, and I'm sure our goals are nearly the same. Don't worry, we'll make it through, no matter what it takes!
Gambatte!
i got C cup doing nothing!!! ngek ngek ngek...
ReplyDeleteanyway, Andrew/ Hafiz... i'll will always love you guys in whatever shapes and sizes... bcoz i know, u'll always the same person deep inside... that what counts... mmuaaahhhhh....
andrew dear,
ReplyDeleteu need protein shakes.
space ur workout by one day or rest, so that the muscle have time to grow back and grow more.
less on cardion and more on high intensity weights.
low intensity reps will help u to LOSE weight.
dont scrap the posture thing though, good posture is always GOOD
just my two cents worth... tata
hafiz - hafiz!!! hugs hugs! You are so right! We are on the same ship! But you do have a nicer body than me k! THAT'S FINAL !!! I think I might end up having a PT afterall once I returned home. That's the shitty thinge ... our body need massive, constant mainteneance ... I hate that! Why can't we just be born beautiful ... I want to be beuatiful !!!!
ReplyDeleteLeo - omigod! I thought yours a D! hehehe ... thanks so much for the love!!! Felt better. But if i got nicer body, it would be better right? right? :P
xavier - hmmm ... I heard that protein drink if you stop taking half way, you will lose the shape... would it help if you take portein drink but don't do heavy weights like in gym? Would lifting at home work???
u just want to bulk up a lil right? not up to muscleman kan? so the protein shake is ok one
ReplyDeletethe thing is it's about weight, the weight need to be heavy enough so u can only do few reps, and few cycle per session, then rest for a day or two. so if u are getting stronger then u will need more weights... so if u can supply that from home then ok lo, else u might need to hit the gym..
start off with at home first, until u already can throw the weights with one finger then baru hit the gym lo..
:p happy GROWING
ur 'beautiful' the way you are Andrew! kyen
ReplyDeleteMy body not nice lah. Still skinny what. But at least not as skinny as Brian. Ngek ngek ngek. Nvm, I be your PT. No problem waannn. Just remember the point in growing big is 60% depends on what you eat/nutritions, and the balance is all about the training and sufficient rest. Hahah. I have been brain washed by all the people giving me advise on how to grow.
ReplyDeleteHey being scrawny and thin is easier than being slightly overweight. Much easier bulking up ( and far more pleasurable ) than starving away :)
ReplyDeletepaul
How I wish I can pass you some of my fat.. LOL
ReplyDeleteD?? nop... D only for Bimbos and above... nyek nyek nyek...
ReplyDeleteMilk=Meal lololol
ReplyDeleteCan you two mr fuckers aka Andrew and Hector stop whining about how thin you are....
ReplyDeleteI fuking wanna loose weight and I still piling up all the pounds and ounces by just sucking air and drinking 'air' (water)/
I can't even eat and my teeth are all corroded by gastric acid as I make myself puke right after each milk....and I STILL PUT ON WEIGHT...what the Hell....
So, you two 'd better shut the heck up or else I'm gonna make ya both suck my cock's fat. lolol
Seriously, Andrew U r not thin okay, got six packs and nicely shaped.
And Hafiz, U r not thin okay, U r just ergh, (fuck, what's the word), TONED!
lololol
rgds
shine
xavier - yeah. shall save money for it! hehe ... begin to carry more milk cartons :P, look weird by doing it ... but what the heck!~
ReplyDeletekyen - erm ... why u quote beautiful one :_(
hafiz - yup yup! I shall remember it! Don't care a! PT a! PT PT! This Xmas, we exchange gift (protein drink ok?)!
savante - been trying to bulk up since 2002 ... 4 years liao! I still look so thin! ... now only my stomach showing sign of growing!
cava - fats? good fats i don't mind ... but muscle better le :P
leo - hahaha! are you implying someone :P hahahaha
shine - your no help la! wanna talk about nice body, me and hafiz should idolize you la! but we choose not to ... cos you're a bad mentor! :P lol hahahahaha .... and you never put up weight! its in your head only!
hey aussieland is making me fat!
ReplyDeleteWorse, have rivercruise coming tml and I'm having apples and chco cookies for dessert!
T.T
sumone? nooooo lahhhh.... juz the majority... hik hik... chooi yin tak bimbo pun... muahahhahhhh!!!
ReplyDeleteAndrew: High-5! Whenever Shine says he's fat, just agree with him.
ReplyDeleteShine: You are fat! And you call yourself a marathon runner. They are NOT supposed to be FAT. There! Ok ah? Shit, feel bad suddenly :(
Leo: If Chooi Yin bimbo, Jenny you nak letak mana?