I probably shared the same idea as this friend who told me that love is choice. To love with requirements, is to use the requirements to valid an exit in the future. To love with desire, is to use the desire to fall out of love when it is obsolete or absence. To love unconditionally, is to love blindly, almost impossible and in some perspective, filled with vulgarity and obscenity.
Being human, it is inevitable that most of us face the cruelty of love. You either fall into the category of no longer wanting to be with that someone, or that someone no longer want to be with you. Just like a sea breeze that can sail a ship, the little devil feeling that is developed can multiple into a wave of disappointment, depression, complaints and without you knowing, soon there will be pointing fingers, hurt, drunken, sober and the cycle continues.
So, what do we really want? Is it true that it is better to be loved than love? Is it true that love should just flow like a running tap water until someone closes it? Does love deserve the sacrifice, the gutting of self emotional, the fasting of soul and expressions ... just to at the end, subject love to scrutiny of society, personal judgments, eruption of tears? At the end, abjection of the death of being together ...
I finally understood what keeps couples committed. Hope. Hope that all will end well. Hope that all bad will past. Hope that your partner never dies in hoping the same, in feeling the butterflies in tummy for as long as it takes, in forgiving, in being everything and nothing and hopefully, just hopefully ... hoping back the same.
Complicated as it is, we both concluded that love should just be easy. Love should just be coming home, feeling good, closing one eye and living the rest of your life together.
I really do not know what to feel after that conversation but I like going home. Home where the heart hurts, heals and comforts. That's really a something conversation eh?
New strap-on replacement. Why are accessories so costly nowadays? Pic edited to look vintage.