I was jealous. I admit it. Seeing KW and his bf still together makes me jealous. Two very different individuals, well-known for their contradictions and acceptance level ... still together till this very day. Six years ... and still close. I heard stories about them, and truly I admire their love. They went through shit ... and after a series of breakups, seeing them in gym ... stabs me deep inside.
My beloved K ... is not around ...
I wish I never had made those mistakes in life. I can't help but compared them to me and K. K and I were everything, something special everyone was seeking to have ... but nothing is perfect. People can say what they like but deep down inside me, I know we had that magic a lot of people will envy and search the world for.
Yes ... I am tearing and crying writing this. The pain is still there ... and I am not too sure when it will stop. But I will try to be stronger. I know I am not suppose to hurt myself, but I am glad I am still tearing. It means, I still love him ... I am still human ... and I am still his boy
It feels good to blog, knowing that it's a brand new, fresh start. Not a lot of people is reading this. Good way to express myself. Cheers to the new start, a continuum of andrewkin